The Early Bus

If I do say so myself, I'm getting a lot better, quite quickly on my rollerblades. I haven’t mastered the crossover turn yet, but I'm sure I'll get there eventually.

I quickly I got to the bus stop this morning. I got there and there was two buses waiting. The 7:45 bus hadn't left yet so I thought I would hop on that one.

I don't know if it was to the pollution warning on the TV last night, asking people to car pool/take the bus or if it was just the earlier bus, but this bus is packed. As I write this I count 34 people... Well dressed business people... Well dressed business people that are looking at me... this sweaty, out of breath, Brit, wearing a helmet and Pads on my elbows and knees. I roll down the aisle saying "morning", but all I see is people looking up from their laptops and iPads in disgust.

I just went to the back of the bus where kitchen area was and got changed into my flip flops, ready for the business day.

What? You mean you don't wear flip flops to work?

Now I have got changed I have sat next to a woman who, let's say, had a bit of trouble moving her bag off the seat where I wanted to sit. I can't imagine why she would have a problem sitting next to the sweaty mess that is me. I think someone needs a hug :0)

I think she just read that. Oops!

Ooh it hurts… right down there and around there.

This morning I jumped out of bed ready to tackle the day head on. I did jump… but I landed on my face. This is something that is becoming a bit common at the moment. My legs are as stiff as boards. My shoulders hurt and I have blisters on my shins (something that I have never experienced before).

I decided to walk to the bus stop on the way to work with the boots tied to my bag.

Last night I couldn’t help but watch some clips on YouTube of people weaving in and out of cones as if they were dancing. It is truly amazing and something to aspire to.

I decided that I will stick to it, so after the bus had driven off from the ride back home after work, I found myself left at the kerb tightening my laces and reminding myself of the things I have seen on YouTube and the things people have said. Bend your knees, balance, turn with your shoulder, don’t talk with your mouth full, push off with your heals, focus on the horizon … and off I went.

I’m up… I’m moving… I’m down… I’m sliding. Well that didn’t quite go like the YouTube videos I had seen!

One thing I have learned is how to stand up on roller blades. I know it seems like a trivial thing, but when you have spent as much time landing on your arse as me, this sort of thing helps.

Off I go again… “Focus on the horizon, don’t look at your feet…. Left… right…”

I’m actually doing it. Before I know it I am making strides, literally strides and making good progress, cruising past yesterday’s accident spots. “In your face accident black spot”

There was a guy in front of me who was walking at a good pace, and I thought as long as I can keep up with him or even better get past him, I am winning. He would be like my pace car.

I shoot past him as he shouts “evening, sure is a nice day for it”

“I’m not doing too bad it is my second day of tried this… I can’t stop to chat… no, literally I can’t stop” I say as I zoom past down the hill.

The main problem with going downhill you indubitably either end up going into another hill, or a stream of some sort. I got the hill. I pushed and pushed as hard I could until I got to the top where the man I just zoomed past had caught up and started walking next to me.

“So where in England are you from?” he said as I was back to doing baby steps.

“Northampton” I say.

“Oh right. I lived Oxford for a few years… You’ll soon master the skates; you just have to stick with it.”

Before I knew it, I was at the bottom of my street, on the home stretch. Three falls (compared to yesterday) and 10 minutes knocked off yesterday’s time. I just have to knock another 15 off and then I break even in terms of the time it takes to get to the bus stop.

I’m going to stick with it, even though the blister has now popped on my shin… ew nice!

eurgh, what was I thinking!!

So yesterday I had this great vision of a young muscular, erm how should I put this.. I’ll go with, a “bronzed god” streaming past unsuspecting members of the public as they look on with an expression of ore on their faces. “Is he floating on a cloud” they would ask as angels sing in the background.

And that’s exactly what happened… well not quite.

I work up this morning and the ground was wet so I thought I would walk. That turned out to be the best decision I made all day.

After showing off my backpack and skates to my co-workers, I finally had to grin and bear it. I was going have to skate home from the bus stop. I’m getting to know the bus driver quite well now and we quite often have a little chat before we go our separate ways in the evenings.

As I sat on the bottom step of the bus, he congratulated me on going for it and saying “remember, take it slow”…and off I went.

There is a smooth bit of road behind the Meijer store where I get the bus… gently, gently all going good. I didn’t take into account the fact that the weight of my backpack my just have caused me to be a little off balance (excuse #1).

Man, my ankles hurt… keep going, just keep going, bend your legs… keep going straight… MIND THE…. Too late. I was on my bum.

If you fall off a horse you get back on… keep going, swing your arms… God its hot… don’t look at your feet, D’oh! On my arse again. I finally got to the Monon train which is like the home stretch. After three falls I got to a fence where a girl was listening to her iPod, stretching her legs from running.

“I should of got a bike” I say to her.

“You’ll get better with practice. You just need to use your ankles more. It’s difficult to explain but you push off with your heals then steer with the front of your feet.” With this in mind off I go again. And it worked!........ for about 30 seconds.

A quarter of a mile from home, and I am spent! I literally have bruises on my arms and legs and no energy left at all. I gradually went up the hill that just yesterday I was zooming up. I made it to the door and collapsed in a heap as the kids were eating their dinner.

Two bottles of water and a shower later I have just about got my breath back.

I think looking back at it in hindsight, it was a bit ambitions on the first attempt. Like my great father once said to me: “If at first you don’t succeed, give up and do something else”. I will try again though, but maybe I’ll walk a bit too.

I have new wheels

• Good - I have to leave work on time, so I get to see more of my family
  
• Bad - I need to catch the bus
  
• Good - I can chill out, get online or work on the commute
  
• Bad - it takes another 45mins to walk from the bus stop and home twice a day.
  
• Good - I'm walking 5 miles a day, and getting much needed exercise.
  

I need a way to reduce the walking time between home and bus stop.

I'm not exactly sure whether it is the smooth paths, the people skating on the Monon trail or the fact that I have been working on maltoskatesallday.com, but I have a desire to skate or should I say rollerblade. In my minds eye, I would like people to look and say, whow look at that guy go. I know deep down they will probably say, "whow that aging bald guy managed to stay up for 10 seconds that time. When I hit 30 and day I want to skate, slap me because that guy looks a mess".

The truth is, right now I don't care. I get the bus fairly early, so hopefully there won't be too many people watching (just enough to pull me out of the hedge), plus the kids are at an excepting age where they don't use the phrase "I wouldn't be seen dead with him".

Today I said bollocks to it and bought the skates, knee pads and a back pack for my laptop. I had a test run today and I made it to the end of the street without falling over. How hard can it be? One thing that did surprise me is the amount of sweat that pours off me. It is 35oC after all.

Tomorrow is the day of reckoning. Bus stop here we come!

Note to self: look up methods of stopping before getting on rollerblades.

Not quite getting it

So I have been riding the muggle wagon to and from work and am actually starting to enjoy the benefits. Not paying for gas, I mean petrol, and to fork out for a parking permit is great. The real benefit is getting exercise in the morning as it is a 45 minute walk to the bus stop. It's not all fun and games as there are some bits that don't have paths, but I figure walking 5 miles a day has to be good for me... I have even lost weight! Well, just a little.

There is a down side to taking the bus. Two words... “Exact change”.
Since now I have been good at looking out for the $1 bills.

I gently strolled over to the stop after work, opened my wallet… and hey presto… empty. Knowing this was the last bus of the day I soon had the feeling of panic rush over me.

I knew that the bus does a loop around ten blocks so I ran past the bus stop in the 29oC heat, lugging my massive laptop bag and a plastic bag with an empty lunch box flapping around, banging on my knee on every alternate step.

I made it to the ATM (cash point). The card readers are slightly different here. You kind of pull the card in then out really quick. I slid my card in and out waited... Nothing.... I try it again and I get "transaction canceled".

Come on, come on. I try again and again. It gave me the "fast cash" option… ironically on the 4th attempt.

I then run 2 blocks in a different direction to get a bag of crisps to break the $20. At this point I have a big beetroot face.

I then run 4 blocks north to get to the next bus stop on the loop.

Made it... Phew! I can even see my bus as a dot on the horizon.

"HEY BUDDY!" - this tattooed guy with two missing front teeth and a scrawny looking stubble, shouts running at me with a "I'm gonna hunt you down" type look.

"er yes" I say in a 'happy to help, please don't kill me' type way.

"I must have been chasing you for 3 blocks. Man you run fast. Didn't you hear me shout? You dropped you wallet!"

"oh thank you" I say, knowing what a pain in the arse it would have been if I did lose it.

"no problem"

"can I have it?" said holding out my hand.

"oh I don't have it - a lady saw you drop it, 2 blocks that way."

"well I was running for that bus, can you run fast to show me this lady? Sorry to do this to you but that is the last bus of the day, so we need to run." - it really didn't matter how positive I wanted to sound to get this guy moving, it is really difficult to motive a toothless guy that looks like he is about to spit blood.

We finally found the lady holding my wallet. She looked like hyacinth bucket (bouquet) from keeping you appearances. I didn't have time to explain, so I took a quick glance in the wallet to check for my cards and then gave her a peck in the cheek to say thanks. It was a split second thing where I thought "Well I am European. "

I ran back to the bus stop. At this point I became aware of a little crowd commentating from the second level of a multistory car park, who had witnessed the whole thing. When the doors of the bus opened a cheer came from above.

I got on the bus and nearly passed out from the running. I told the bus driver I nearly didn't make it.

I found out from my previous journeys that the bus driver is a Brit who lived in Aylesbury called Mick. He married an American and has lived here since 1985. He used to be the sound engineer for Kim Wilde when she was touring. He looks a lot like Bill Nighy but swept back grey hair.

When I told him what I had been through he said, "If you are a regular, I could do you an IOU." I said I would hold him to it.

… the moral of the story is get change!

Our Big St Louis Adventure.

Time for a break me thinks. In the USA you get Holiday time and vacation time. Holidays are what I would have called Bank holidays and Vacation is what I what call Holiday, just so you know the difference. Compared to 22 days vacation I used to get in the UK, I now get just 10. I have started to notice more now than ever how people plan their time so that Holidays are taken side-by-side with vacation so that time off lasts longer. Hopping on the band wagon I booked time off work to spend a long weekend with my family.

I want to see as much of the USA as possible. I’m getting to the stage now where I have seen quite a bit of Indiana, and know my way around Indianapolis without a GPS Sat Nav. Sarah and I looked at a map to find out what was fairly close (within 6 hrs drive) we could take a look at. We finally settled on St Louis, Missouri.

Before we go to St Louis


On our way to St Louis (Sarah driving)


When we finally got to the hotel I was greeted by a warm glowing face saying how can I help you sir….NOT! As I got to the desk I was faced with a girl covered in (what looked like gang) tattoos, chew gum looking at me as if she had no face muscles.

“I have a reservation… here are the details” I say as I hand here a print out

“It not ready until 3pm” as she flicks the paper back to me.

What I didn’t realize is that we crossed a time zone, so everything is off by an hour. We decided to take a drive to the museum to kill some time before our room was ready.

before going to the museum


just visited the museum #1


just visited the museum #2


Our accommodation was bed and breakfast only so we decided to have dinner at the olive garden. I have never been there and the last time Sarah had been, was around 15 years ago.

arrived at the olive garden


After olive garden


Day 2 just getting up before breakfast


Playing with the bug screen after breakfast before the zoo


In the water falls at the zoo


At the zoo - Zack Telling us we have just seen animals and insects

At the zoo - looking at the bear


At the zoo - after the gift shop

Riding with the Muggles

I’m starting on a bit of an adventure today. I’m taking the bus to work. I know this isn’t probably a big deal and loads of people do it, but it is something I am starting to do.

Dan, my co-worker who I catch a lift with has selfishly (kidding) moved out of where he was living to set up a bachelor pad of his own. The result of this being that when the car is needed by Sarah to run errands and scoot kids around etc, I need to find a different way to get to work. I am seriously seeing this as blessing in disguise. I mean, there will be no excuses for doing not doing exercise. It is really easy to fall out of bed into your car, drive up to the office door and do the same in reverse at the end of the day. I have just spoken to the bus driver and he says that it is fine to put a push bike underneath the coach, so I will be able to cycle to the bus stop and then take it from there.

I helped Dan move on Saturday, which was a good laugh. He even bought us lunch to say thanks.

As I write this I am actually on the bus. I love the fact that I can hook my laptop up to my phone and get in the internet while moving. (that said I will need to put it away if anybody come near me… he bus is quite empty just now.
Zack has this box car race today. This is where they have a race wearing cardboard boxes decorated to be like race cars. They called it the kindy500… you know, like the Indy 500 race. I thought I may have over done it in helping him because we sprayed it and did some really cool things we card and hot glue. When I took it in the other day there were some there how had gone all out and put sponsor stickers on them as well. I didn’t feel too bad after that.

Having all this extra glue around gave me an idea. I peeled back all the duct tape that was holding the bumper together and used hot glue. I have to say it worked a treat, and isn’t as ropey looking as the tape. It is really solid now. The down side is that I got bitten by a few bugs while I was fixing it.

It is sooooooo hot here just now, with high humidity. You know when you go on holiday and they open the doors of the plane, and it feels like an over door opening… well that what happens each time you go out of an air conditions shop door (I love it).

Our air conditioning is out at the moment. Apparently the kids stuck a stick in the fan and a puff of smoke came out. Sarah was very cross with the kids as they have been told hundreds of times not to go near it. The guy came out to look at it, but I’m sure I will find out what the upshot of that is sometime today.

We are off to St Louis on Friday and I am really looking forward to having a break from work. Its good and all that but it I looking forward to seeing a bit more of the country/culture and spending time with the family away from the damn TV. It is quite a long journey but I got some of those DVD players that strap to the back of the head rests (that I fully Intend on taking back when I done with them).

One thing that is really good here, is that if you pay by card and you return the goods in “original packaging for resale” they will take it back now questions asked. Result!

changing my vocabulary

I am sure that this wouldn’t be a problem in most professions, but when you are an interactive developer (or at least that’s what it says on my business card) there are certain things you are used to that suddenly become, well, different. The first shock is the keyboard. The pound sterling sign is gone, the@ sign is now above the 2 and the enter key is half the size as there is a button with a \ on it just above it!

OK, I get it. A mountain out of a mole hill right? I’m just moaning about a stupid keyboard… I have managed to get used to the keyboard is not the main problem.

When I worked in the UK I knew that:

• # is called a hash
• ( ) are called brackets
• { } are called curly bracket
• [ ] are called square brackets
• ! is called an exclamation mark
• . is called a full stop

The first time this came to bite me in the arse was when I was setting up my phone. “When you have entered you 4 digit code press the pound key” came the automated voice. I go looking for £, but see nothing. I ended up googling what a pound looked like to find out it is the # sign.

On Thursday last week I was (nerd alert) shouting across the room what code needs to be written. “You need to type this dot that open then close brackets.” What was written was “this.that{}” when what I was meaning is “this.that()”.

It turns out that in America:

• # is called a pound
• ( ) are called parentheses
• { } are called curly brackets
• [ ] are called square brackets
• ! is called a bang
• . is called a period

I think I have got my head around it now, but I does catch me off guard every once in a while. I was told a password the other day that was something along the lines of “wi!!son” but as I wrote what was being said it came out as “wibangbangson”.

I’m getting it now… It only took six months! (bang)

DQ Fun

So today I thought I would give myself a little treat. I have been working on two projects that went live this week. The Tropicana mobile site (seen by going to Tropicana.com using an iPhone, or similar) and the rice-a-roni.com website.

There is a Dairy queen just at the top of the street where we live. I guess you would describe dairy queen a bit like McDonalds, but instead of a large selection of burgers, there is a selection of ice cream. They have savory stuff too but it is mainly ice cream.

As I came home today I could see it was busy, and thought to myself I might pop in there and have an ice cream…. But I’ll do this after dinner. Doing it that way I will only go if I am not full. I love the idea of going out for ice-cream. It is not something you generally do in there UK, but it is quite a common occurrence here. My rule of thumb is this: If you are willing to walk (not drive) the ice cream place you can have it. If you’re not you don’t. At the very least, doing it this way you force yourself to do some exercise to get it.

When I got in the there it was heaving! There was a line of about 10 people in front of me, as well as the people who had ordered and where waiting for the food to be prepared to take it away… Not to mention the line of car circling the building waiting at the drive thru window to get served. The way it generally works is that one person takes the order and the cash and somebody else preps the food.

It was really loud in there and the lady taking my order could hardly hear was I was saying.

“I really sorry, I don’t hear so well. I’m Sikh so it is difficult to understand” she says.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m British and nobody understands what I say either. It sounds like we have a common problem” I say as she is taking my order.

“I much prefer your voice to the yap yap of….”

“CAN I HAVE THE ONE WITH THE ORIO TOPPING” I say, interrupting her before she gets a chance to finish her sentence since we were stood in a full restaurant.

The next thing I do is pay. Let me introduce you to a very childish game I like to play in take away restaurants. When you pay the cashier asks you your name. The first time this happened to me I though the girl was being a bit forward, but then I realized that it was to call it out when my food was ready. OK, so here are the rules of the game:

1. Pay cash. If you have a credit card they can read your name right off it, and it can cause problems (trust me on this, I learnt the hard way)

2. Make sure the restaurant is busy

3. Say it quickly, but spell it slowly.

When you food is ready they call out your name. So far I have got away with the posh English double barreled name of “Harry bool-larks” but bollocks doesn’t mean much here (made me laugh though) and “Paul Mikeoc” that a few people looked up at.

I’m going to up my game and give a Russian name of “Oliver Clothsof”.

Louisville Kentucky Trip.

I want to take advantage of seeing as much of the states as I can. So far we have been to Illinois, Ohio and of course Indiana. Today I wanted to head south to Kentucky! Home of the… well… colonel sanders and KFC (although technically he was from Indiana, but they don’t shout about that much).

We went to a place called Louisville which is right on the other side of the Indiana/Kentucky border. Once we got there we headed for the Louisville Science Center where they had a robots exhibit. Zack loved it.

It was a nice sunny day with an experience at a place called white castle that left me thinking we really were the other side of the tracks.

Gradually and gradually we are going further out to experience the different parts of America. We have booked for a holiday in North Carolina, so I think it will be a real challenge entertaining the kids for more than 10 hours of sitting in the back seat of the car.

Dora The Explorer... Bullets... Dora the Explorer... Bullets

This is what happened in WalMart yesterday.

Roll a six to start

It seems that over time credit is starting to build. More specifically, credit card companies and insurance companies now have our address and are bombarding us with junk mail. So far capital one has sent out 8 letters in 6 weeks. That is just taking the piss.

Luckily there is an unsubscribe number you can call to stop them sending this crap in the mail.

I rang it to unsubscribe and I was told that it was a voice activated out of hours automated system.

"Hello, Press one for English ... Para Español, por favor, pulse dos." - The voice says

"1" - I Press

We have detected you are calling from a land line. Would you like us to look up your address based on your phone number? Say press “1” or say “Yes” alternatively say “no” or press “2”

Yes

I didn't catch that

1

Your address is xxxxxxxxxxxx

Say yes or press 1 to confirm

1

Stay the name you wish to unsubscribe followed by the spelling, for example for John you would say John – J. O. H. N.

Sarah – S. A. R. A. H.

Sharron ?

Sarah - es - ay -are - ay - haytch

Sorry I didn't catch that

Sarah - eeesss - aaaaayyy - aareee - aaaayyyyy - aych

Sarah?

Yes... Get in!

Gretchen?

No no no - it was fine before.

Gretchen spelt – G. R. E. T. C. H. E. N.

NO - it's Sarah

Sharron spelt – S. H. A. R. R. O. N. is this correct? Press 1 for yes or say no.

No -

What name please.

Sarah - es - ay -are - ay - aytch (without the h sound. Remember they say herbs like erbs here)

Sorry I didn't catch that

Sarah - eeesss - aaaaayyy - aareee - aaaayyyyy - aych!

Sarah?

Yes

Thank you.... Sarah has now been unsubscribed.

Have a nice day!

Click

Job eventually Done

You can hear it in my accent when I talk… I'm an Englishman trying to rent a property

On my run around Carmel at the weekend I found a little house that looked, well, ok. There were some bits that needed fixing up bur I figured it was worth give the number a call. Last Monday I rang the number to see what the deal is. The voice on the other end of the phone was a Hispanic lady who said it was a three bed house with a rental price that was in our budget.

Result! I arranged to see it on Tuesday. Before going around I rang her up to be told that she had to go to hospital with her kids and she couldn’t make it. Fair enough let's do Thursday at seven.

Today we went around at seven and it was hammering down with rain. Not a sprinkling, but rather a full on down pour. I kind of figured that this is the best time to go because if there are leaky roofs or things wrong with the property, today would be the day that they would show up.

The first thing we noticed was a lack of drainage in the garden and the four of us found ourselves jumping on these raised stepping stones to get to the main porch. I thought to myself “it’s a bit odd them leave all the building equipment on the porch in the rain, but there you go I guess.

Ding dong - WOOF bloody WOOF.

I turn to look at my darling daughter looking into the window as a Great Dane dog slobbers all over the window that she is standing next to. "Come away, too don't want to scare it" I say to K to distract her as the drool from this huge animal slides down window.

" sí" says the little man who answered the door

"Hello, I'm here to look at the property as we are likely to rent it out" I say

“Er, I am laying floors at the moment and it is a real mess in here.” Says the man.
Well we have an appointment with Daniela at seven... don't worry I'll give her a call.

I ring her number while stood in the pouring rain to be told that she has rented it out to her brother.
Great! Thanks for the heads up on that one... Silly cow.

I have to say this is becoming a bit of a common theme here. I ring up an agent or private owner and they take my details and don't get back to me. I'm starting to think it is due to the way I talk.

I think I might have to get one of my coworkers to ring to pretend to be me to get me the appointments.

I guess in hindsight it was a good job that we didn't go for this house. I mean if she is this scatty before anybody moves in, can you image the trouble we would get in if we had moved in and we were unable to get hold of her if there was no hot water or a flood.

jumping from pad to pad

The plan was to get a short lease for say 6 months then we would have a chance to look around and find something with maybe more rooms and space for the kids to run around in. Where we ended up was no accident. It is in the school boundary for Carmel Elementary school. From what I have read this is one of the top elementary schools around here. The only thing is that our lease for this apartment is coming to an end and we need to find somewhere else. A great opportunity you may think. I thought the same until I stated getting into logistics and the reality of it all.

Carmel is (dare I say) quite an exclusive location and the school boundary for the school is quite small. To find a 3 bedroom property that isn’t double what we are paying right now is quite a challenge. I have been looking at websites like “For Rent” to see what we can find. A few are just outside the boundary, and few are really expensive. I short listed a few and rang them up earlier in the week but only one has come back with any kind of decent response. We look at this on Tuesday.

In the meantime I have taken up my new fitness routine that involves running around stereotypical American neighborhoods looking for rental signs and using my phone to take pictures of them. I don’t imagine it will be too long until the Police are called as it must look quite odd seeing some bald bloke taking a photo of a house then running again.

If that did happen I kind of see a faulty towers moment where someone says “It’s ok… he’s from England”

It has been a really nice day today and now I am back from my run, I now have found that I have sunburn on my head.

Warning glow in the dark Brit approaching!

I actually like being mocked.

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Today is St Patrick’s Day and there are few “Irish” traditions that I had no idea about. I’m sure if someone came over from Ireland they wouldn’t know it either!
I work up this morning to hear the news that they have put green dye in the Chicago River.



It is really weird as, when I had the padding pool back home I would spend most of my time trying to stop it from being green.

I was told (although it fell on deaf ears) that on St Patrick’s Day it is traditional to wear something green. I thought that one or two people might join in, but as it turns out that EVERYONE wears green. Colleges, bosses, friends, police officers, strangers… EVERYONE! … except me (as it turns out). I found myself in a meeting today feeling a bit left out and ended up tucking the green dry wipe board marker in my shirt so at least there was something green on me.

At lunchtime Dan and I went to an Irish pub called Claddagh to have a pint of Guinness. It was packed full of jolly Americans wearing green and having ginger beards. I was a guy wearing a t-shirt that say 0% Irish.. 100% drunk, which I thought summed up the atmosphere quite well. It looked like quite a few people had taken the day off. I have to admit that after a pint I was more than willing to settle in, but thought better of it and go back to the office.

There were quite a few people walking around in kilts. I am gutted that I didn’t wear the kilt I have with me. I know it doesn’t have green on it, but next year I am definitely wearing it.

Before you ask, the answer is not I won’t!

Oh its date night... oh what a night

Sarah and I always relied on Mum & Dad to look after the kids so we could have some “US” time. As a result, we have never needed a baby sitter. We have been here since the 20th of October 2010 and haven’t been out together as a couple since arriving. Last Friday I got a baby sitter. It was the daughter of Dan my co-workers friend from his church. (I feel I should say twice removed somewhere in there).
After finishing work I picked her up and took her back the apartment to meet Katie and Zack. She was good and Katie liked her a lot (although Zack slept straight through and didn’t even know she was here).

We decided to go to the Old Library, also known as Woody’s. Upstairs there was a restaurant and downstairs there is a bar.
We went up stars and asked for a table for two.

“Do you have a reservation?” asked the hostess. What’s the big deal, there are only two of us. How difficult can this be?

“No” says I

“I’ll just check the book at see if we can squeeze you in… ah yes I think there is a space” She says opening a book that is 3 inches thick.

We go around the corner to find out this place is really tiny inside. Really small, but very VERY nice. The whole restaurant is laid out like a library with table tacked on to bookcases, and enclosed dining table surrounded by books. The hostess then presented the menus to us in inch think books. I thought that these menus have far too much selection for me to pick something to east. I than realized inside the book there were plastic menus inside. It was all just to keep the theme of the old library.

The food was fantastic! I got the Fish n Chips.

This always amuses me as in America they call Chips “fries”. They call Crisps “Chips”. This is fine except when they refer to Fish ‘n’ Chips as this means chips. Not knowing I was English I asked if the Chips were like the Tangy Cheese Dorito Chips or the Cool Ranch Dorito Chips.

“No Sir, it’s not Fish ‘n’ Chips it is Fish ‘n’ Steak Fries”.

“Oh I’m sorry I was a little confused as it said chips” I say

I know it is petty but it really amuses me.

After we ate we went down stairs and sat at the bar for a bit. It was a very nice place and I look forward to having a beer or two in the garden when summer finally get here and it warms up a bit.

We got back to the apartment and Abby the babysitter had an easy time with the kids. She said they were really well behaved and Zack didn’t even wake up. (Next time I will make sure the kids are loaded up with sugar and make her earn her money! :0) Muhahah)

On the way back to her house, I talked about when my brother and I used to be babysat and the things that we used to get up to. I remember my brother Damian loading an umbrella with confetti and persuading our babysitter to open it while I dropped things down from the top landing. I remember there being a lot of laughter (by all three of us) but I am pretty sure it was our babysitter who had to clean all the mess up while we slept.

Great days!

Cincinnati Zoo & Ikea

I have been working long hours. For 3 weeks now I have been working very hard on the new Rice-A-Roni website. It has been a very good learning experience and I have learned more CSS tricks and tips than ever before. I would have been done in a week if it wasn’t for Internet Explorer 6. DOWN WITH IE6!

Anyway, I wanted to make it up to Sarah and the kids for not being here so much and decided that we should go on a trip. While we are here I want to visit as many states and places as possible. We have been to Illinois so I thought that today we could visit the magical state of Ohio and go to Cincinnati. I don’t know much about Cincinnati other than it has a Zoo, an Ikea and an Amrican football team called the Cincinnati Bengals.

I find it is always good to go out with a game plan. You get up early, you make sure that the kids have got something to do in the back of the car while you are driving, you have an overnight bag and a change of clothes just in case… and you bring food with you for the journey.

It took around 2hours 45 minutes to get to the Zoo from our house and was quite a nice journey. The roads were smooth and clear while the sunshine shone the whole day.

Central Indiana if flat… very flat! In fact I can’t remember the last time I saw a hill. Imagine East Anglia, but patted down with a huge spade followed by a lawn roller. It comes to something when you get vertigo from going over speed bumps, but that is how I am starting to feel.

The first obvious different is that in Ohio, it is about 10 miles an hour slower on the roads. The second is that they have a hill.

The zoo is on the west side of the city so it didn’t take long to get to. To get to the Zoo you go through a neighborhood that has quite unique looking houses where no two are the same. I really liked them. It kind of reminded me of the buildings you get in San Francisco going up the hills.

The zoo was modern and the kids really loved it. When I asked what Zacks highlight was, he replied watching that penguin squirt its poo where that other penguin was swimming. “My Boy Everyone!” I’m so proud.

After we were done with the zoo (and by that I mean “done in by the zoo”… It was on a hill… I forgot what they were like!) we went to the Ikea. It was only 10 minutes away.

Back in the UK we used to take our kids to Ikea for a treat. (Go with me here because it’s true). There is an indoor kids area called “small land”, where you can dump the kids off and you pick them up after you have been shopping. From the kid’s point of view, this is an extra special treat they get for being good. From our point of view, it is an hour off, while basically sit on the furniture and get our breath back.

The main difference between Ikea in the USA and Ikea in the UK is…. Bugger all. In fact, (dare I say) it reminded me of home and was very comforting. The best bit was that they do the mini dime bars covered in milk chocolate. You need to understand that chocolate here is, well, crap! It says milk, but it tastes bitter but not like dark chocolate. It’s horrible in my opinion. This was the first time that I had descent chocolate since I have been here.

On the way back Sarah and I took it in turns to drive back. I am so glad we could do it in shifts, as I could really feel my eyes getting heavy.

A good day was had by all. I’m gonna stuff my face with “milk” chocolate now!

Knowing the Lingo

So today I was in a meeting and I was told that we are to some work for a “Top Shelf” client. When I was asked why I looked so excited about it, I said that usually my darling wife doesn’t even let me have that kind of stuff in the house… and now I get to see it at work! Result!

It turns out that a “Top Shelf” in this context means “extremely attractive or supreme person or thing”, rather than the top shelf where all the dirty magazines are kept.

There was me thinking we were doing the next Playboy website!

More Slippage

Today at work we work talking about… well… work and I found myself saying “inner ned” rather “Internet”. I thought this to be a one off thing until I got home in the evening and got into a situation where I was trying to convince my darling daughter (Katie) to get ready for bed.

“KAY-DEE COM-OWN” – I heard myself shout.

Shocked at this, I am now taking elocution lessons and renting the Mary Poppins DVD, as I am told that “Burt the Chimney Sweep” sounds like a real Englishman.

Wax on Wax off

They say that old habits die hard. Back in the UK I was fairly car proud. I mean I wouldn’t say that I would religiously clean it every weekend, but when it needed doing, I wouldn’t be afraid to get the brushes and buckets out.

Since I have been here I haven’t seen anyone clean their own car. There are lots of car washes around (usually with long lines of cars waiting to be seen), but to see someone outside their own house with so much as a jet wash... So what! I don’t care! All I know is that due to the amount of snow that we have had and the sheer volume of salt that has been put down, my car is so grey that it is blending in the with color of the road.

Time to wash the car me thinks

• Buckets – Check
• Hot Water – Check
• Brushes – Check
• Let’s do this thing!

Off I go, thoroughly washing the windows and liberally using my secret formula of vinegar and washing up liquid to make my car gleam. Carrying on with my usual method of wash, rinse and shine I suddenly realized why nobody cleans their own car here.

The thing that became very obvious while cleaning the other side of the car is that this kind of job is best performed above 0^oC as water (just in case you didn’t know) freezes! I’m sure this seems obvious but you need to realize that in the last 7 weeks the warmest it has been is 2^oC and the coldest it has been -16^oC, but usually it is around the -4^oC mark. After a while you get used to it and forget how cold it actually is. Of course being British I reserve the right to bitch about the cold!

Anyway, I think it is safe to say I have learned my lesson in car washing, as the new method I am adopting is wash, rinse, scrape ice away ...screw it, that will do.

There is no way I am going to stand out here and shine this bloody thing!

How do you like your eggs on the morning?

This is the strangest thing. I didn't think I was odd in wanting a boiled egg. It turns out this is a bit of weird thing. People don't have boiled eggs.

• Scrambled - of course
• Poached - why not
• Fried - absolutely
• Boiled - you what!

I had a conversation the other day with a store clerk at an expensive, sorry, I mean exclusive kitchen shop about where you find egg cups and she had no idea what I was talking about.

“Do you eat the shell?” she asks in a very puzzled way

“No you take the top off” I say

“With what”

“A knife”

“You saw it open”

“No you give a whack”

“How do you eat the stuff in the top”

“It called egg white and you use a spoon... Then dip soldiers in the egg yolk (you know the yellow bit)”

“Soldiers?” she says looking at me as if I’m about to dip military personnel into an egg.”

“Never mind. Do you sell egg cups or not?”

“Er…No.”

I left the store empty handed but felt I had past on valuable knowledge of another culture, oh, that and what the yellow bit is.

Currently we are using coke bottle tops to balance the eggs on but I'm sure they will have a thing called eBay here.

Big Cheese in Chicago

I have a busy day to as I am meeting the big boss of Gatorade. I say meet, I will be in the same room but I’m not sure how bigger part I will play in the meeting.

5:50am - Phone call from Zack’s school to say there is a 2 hour delay on the school bus arriving due to the snow.

6:00am - breakfast with the kids.

6:30am - Wash and dressed (listening to Chris Moyles Breakfast Show on Radio 1. God bless Sirius XM)



6:55am - See the lump of snow that I think is my car… but no path.



7:20 - Found car and dug it out of the snow.



7:25 - Get stuck in traffic



8:30 - Arrive at Greg’s apartment building



8:43 - Swing past the office to pick up business cards



9:10 - Arrive at airport



9:25 - Airport Security: Greg goes through without any problems, I get a scan, pat-down and a look of hope from a guy wearing a latex glove



10:40 - Take off

10:41 - Man reading the newspaper next to me has claimed the middle arm rest

11:10 - He reaches to put the rubbish in the bin that the air hostess is bringing around and I take my chance... Muhahaha (eat my elbow newspaper man).

11:59 - Newspaper man starts chatting to me and he tells me that he once dated a girl from Bristol. I told him I love Bristol city’s...

12:00 - I’m still laughing to myself

12:05 - We get off the plane in to the sunny city of Detroit (Sunny, yeah right). The airport here is a lot like the one at Indianapolis but it has a monorail inside the main terminal. It kind of reminds me of the Disney hotel near the Epcot centre in Florida. I thought to myself this is how the Jetsons must live.



12:10 - Get on second plane to Chicago

12:34 - Still waiting on the plane. There is a delay as there is ice under the wings. The pilot has powered down the plane while a kind of jet wash type thing come and steams it off. Good to see the "Mikes car wash" franchise is branching out.

14:20 - Made it... Now let me out

15:20 - Get taxi to the PepsiCo Building



16:45 - We are massively early, so we wait in the McDonalds across the street.

17:00 - We enter the PepsiCo lobby take the elevator to the top floor where Gatorade is (G level)



17:10 - I am a conference room that overlooks the Chicago and I can see Lake Michigan in all its freezing glory. There are around 30 people from different parts of Pepsi, Gatorade and the New Design Company. We were asked to go around the circle to say who you were, what company you we are from and what your job title was. As we went round the circle, the titles people came out with were, well acronym city! “I’m CEO of VML… I’m VP of PSML… I’m Creative director of Blah blah, I’m executive assistant to the CEO and VP of VML.” By the time it got to me I was unsure what to say as it didn’t seem as grand as all of these. In the end I said I was a web designer, but in my head I so wanted to say “I’m Ben German BSc, with expertise in CSS and SEO, but FYI I’m a VIP, LOL, PMSL.. JK”. I was quite impressed that at least two people from the creative agency had a little goatee thing just under their lip (I think they call it a caterpillar). I’d love to grow one, but whenever I try to do it I start stroking it with my to
p lip and end up being gurner of the year and getting chapped lips.



19:07 - Lets go for drinks... Two words that work best together were then said… “Open Bar” This was a good chance to meet some of the people from the different creative agencies. I suddenly became aware of whose company I was in. The people I am now having a drink with are from the top Creative agencies in the mid west. These people have done work for brands like Ford, Warner Bros, Adidas, HSBC, MSN, Microsoft and Xbox. I was like I was in the company of the Mel Gibson character in “What women want”. You need to understand, as a creative type myself, this was like creative royalty.

20.15 - Back to the airport

21:30 - Gourmet meal in the airport

22:50 - Board the plane

23:15 - Finally taxi to the end of the runway in all the snow.

00:05 - Land in Indianapolis

00:20 - Drop Greg off

01:00 - I get into bed

What a day!

Americans and roundabouts

I have found driving here to be really easy. The roads a straight, the cruise control is a button away (even in my heap of a car) and people seem to leave you to it. The only time you tend to hear a beep from another driver is usually because you are waiting at a red light, but you are allowed to turn on red and they are just reminding you that you are in America.

The only time when the driving is a bit of an issue is when it comes to roundabouts. This is a fairly new phenomenon that is gradually being introduced here and people just don’t understand them. I would love to say it is just the older generations who have a problem with it but there are really no exceptions to the rule. It seems that quite a few people get to the roundabout and forget who has right of way and how to indicate.

When they drive up to it is not done in an aggressive way, but rather a very polite way… “You go first… No you… No I insist” as the cars gently edge towards each other ready to collide.

Yesterday I saw a lady stop on the side of a roundabout to let someone through and cause a two car pileup behind her! Who should get their car towed away first? “You go first… No you… No I insist”.

Arms in the back

At lunchtime today I wanted to go out for a bit of fresh air and see a bit of Indianapolis I haven’t seen before. I went for a wonder around a place called the city market. It is indoor market where they would sell fruit, veg and meat. Since I have been here this is the first time I have seen private individuals sell produce, rather than a big corporation like WalMart. I kind of like the place but you can defiantly tell that is on the other side of the tracks.

It is very close to the city jail. I haven’t seen the city jail but I know it is there because of all the bail bond shops. There is one after another.



The weirdest thing I have seen here is that they are competing for business. I’m not kidding when I tell you I saw a sign in the window saying “half price sale on all bail bonds”. Sounds like a bargain to me… I felt I couldn’t resist an offer like this… so I mugged an old lady!

On my way back to the office there was a thundering bass sound of music blaring from the trunk (boot) of a car. I glanced to see what all the noise was about and saw there were three men pointing and laughing in a kind of shady way stood at the back of the car that was making all the noise. As I walked past one of them I noticed he was holding a belt…or so I thought. It turns out it was a belt of bullets… I kept walking and didn’t look back.

Snowing again!

It has just started snowing again. “Remember indicate when changing lanes!... there are lanes?”

Tomorrow I get to pick up the car from the garage… and now it is snowing again! Great! The only thing is that it was the bloody snow that got me in this mess in the first place. I'll drive more careful this time… in fact I’ll stay on the pavement, it is safer there!

A Pizza Pie!

Today I found a taste sensation pizza pie from Georgio's pizza Indianapolis. This is amazing. It is not pizza as you and I would know it but rather pizza with a bread type lid. Very nice!

A couple of guys from work and I went there for lunch. It is a kind of buffet type thing where you point at what you want and then the plate it up (and toast it if needed) and you pay at the end of the line. You buy it by the slice. When I actually ordered it none of it was cut up so it came as a bit of a shock to how much you get… the answer is LOADS.

I have to say I regret ordering two pieces, but I just had at least have a go at finishing them. No one said anything, but I could tell they were thinking “Fat Bloater” (or an American equivalent).

When I sat down I told them that there must have been some sort of prescription screen between me and the food to make it seem smaller! Not quite sure they bought that one!

After work I met up with my darling Wife and Kids at Red Robin, which I guess it like TGI Fridays. Expats Sian, David and Meg had treated us to a meal there and I was late out of work. By the time I got there they had finished but after pizza-gate I think it was probably a good thing that I wasn’t eating again… it didn’t stop me from having a beer though :0)

Freezing Rain - I have never known anything like it!

I woke up this morning at 5:40am by an automated phone call from the school. You may not know this but because there are school buses here that pick up this kids. If, for whatever reason, there is a delay, an automated phone call rings every household (with a kid at that school) to say the bus will be delayed by so many hours.

Last night we got freezing rain. Being a Brit that has familiarity both the north and south of the UK, I thought I had my fair share of experience with crap weather. When I heard that there would be a delay because of freezing rain, I thought to myself “well that’s we call sleet… that’s no big deal”… and off I go to walk the garage to pick up my car to take it to the second garage.

How wrong could I have been! Freezing rain is the weirdest thing. It coats everything in the finest layer of ice, but it not the kind of ice you get back home that looks like frost. It just looks like, well, puddles…normal puddles. As soon as I stepped outside the door, I slipped and fell on my arse! I held got up (eventually) and held onto the door handle desperately trying not to fall over again.

(2 minute & 52 seconds in is what was going through my head when it happened)

I made it to the end of the street, before falling on my bum a second time. My lovely new phone went sailing down the street. Luckily it missed the storm drain.

I did a penguin type walk all the way to the garage at the end of our road. It turns out walking on the squishy/crunchy ice grass is safer than the paths. I finally made it to the garage to pick up the car.

I drove it to the second garage. The difference between this garage and the other one is that instead of hydraulic lifts, they had an inspection pit... Instead of a shiny white teeth smile he was chewing tobacco… Instead of smart overalls with their names hand stitched on them, they had jeans (complete with oil stains and hairy bum cleavage). I left him the keys and my mobile number.

I got a call from him later in the day. “we have looked at it, and we will needs some parts so sorry if this sounds a bit steep but with labor and tax it comes to $425” he says. Or course I pretended to be shocked and disgusted with the price he had quoted me, but I was literally half the price of the first place. Needless to say it is booked in for next week.

The downside is that this weekend we are without car.

How Much!

How Much!

After the steaming car breaking down in Carmel earlier in the month I have been keeping a close eye on the temperature gauge, so it doesn’t overheat again. Last night when I got back from work, it was back in the red after about 15minutes. I won’t be driving that then!

After getting some advice about the best service centers, I decided to go to the garage or “take it to the shop” as it were. There is a little place in the centre of Carmel that I took it to with a very nice clean garage. The guy there was very helpful and said that they would take a look at it and see how much it is likely to cost to fix. At work later on he rang me back saying that the radiator is cracked, it will need a new thermostat connection hoses and coolant. With labor and tax charges you are looking at a grand total of $845. WHAT THE ____________________________ flat line.

I said thank you, but we both agreed that at that cost it might be worth getting another car! I said I would talk to my wife and let you know what we want to do and drove my car a very short distance back to our apartment. After looking at the internet to get an idea of what we could buy or lease I think it would be worth getting a second opinion on the repair.

I got it covered!

On the way to work I was chatting to Dan about his weekend and asked if he had a chance to visit his sister in hospital after giving birth to a little baby boy called Benjamin (nice name).

"yes. He is a cutie" says Dan.

"is he a good sleeper or does he cry a lot" says I

"no, he is a good lad. He only really cried when he was circumcised"

"circumcised? Why was that? I know you are not Jewish"

"all baby boys are when they are born"

"WHAT?"

"yeah, it's pretty standard, you know, for health reasons"

It turns out that this is very common place here. You are born and then you lose the end of your dinkle. I read up on it on my lunch break and it turns out that this has been happening for generations to “reduce infection”. As long as you keep it clean what is the problem? Dan is surprised that they let me in the country with my foreskin, but I am not giving it up!

On the plus hand I hear they have an excess of rubber bands here!

If asked to do something, I have spent most of the day replying “I’ve got it covered”. (I think it has fallen on deaf ears though).

What a state to be in!

It’s Saturday! Treat time! Both the kids have been working really well at doing their jobs on their responsibility chart. If they do them all we go out and do something nice as a family. This works well for three reasons. 1) I want them to understand the rewards hard work can achieve. 2) It gets them to help with the upkeep of the house. 3) We are not stuck indoors all day, climbing the walls. We moved a long way to get here so the last thing I want to do is spend all day indoors and not see anything.

Last weekend I mentioned that we could go to Lincoln Zoo in Chicago. I have only been to Chicago on plane transfers and was keen to see some of the sights of the windy city. The bad news is that earlier in the week the car engine overheated again. I was not going to risk breaking down at the side of the road especially on such a long journey so I decided to rent a car. This was a full size beast of a car with all the gadgets and gismos like, wheels, brakes and everything!

Off we went with pack lunches, a change of clothes and a snow shovel in the back. The thing was that there wasn’t much to see. At this point I wouldn’t say it was foggy but it was mistier in the distance, so there wasn’t much to see. We carried on following the directions of the SatNav until we go to the outskirts of the city. The freeway was closed and there was a diversion taking us another way. We followed this road until we got to a set or train tracks that crossed the road. A train with about 40 fright carriages was right stood completely still in front of us. Kama is telling us we are not going this way!



We knew our destination was on the shore of Lake Michigan so we kept on heading north. At this point I was really glad we were not in our old Kia as this was defiantly not the place to break down. The only way I can describe this place is the dark side of Gotham city. It was very industrial looking with oil refineries and power stations either side of us. Chimneys with steam and smoke coming out of them as far as the eye can see.

We eventually got back on the “skyway” freeway that goes pretty much directly to the Zoo. Once we park up the Zoo was great! It was an open “free” zoo that was more like a park that had joggers running through it.

(When I say “free” I mean you didn’t have to pay to get in. The animals were still in cages you understand). There were very interesting exhibits and you can get very close to the animals.

Before we knew it, the sun had gone down and it was time to start our long journey home. The SatNav ran out of batteries on the way up the Chicago so all we had were the maps on our mobile phones.

Before making our way home I thought it would be nice to have a leisurely cruise around the city to see some of the sights, such as sears tower and… ok that is all I could think of, but there were tall buildings and twinkly lights and I was in a big American city… Just go with will you!

So on we went… “look at the tall buildings kids”… Beep! “hang on, let me let this taxi get past…. Right… on we go, look at the twinkly lights kids with the …” Beep! … “sorry kids it’s another taxi trying to get past.. right then… over that side there is a…” beep beep” oh for goodness sake!” Sod this, let’s get out of here. I carry on down a stretch of road past trump towers and see some horse drawn carriages. I slow down to get past them. BBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPP! Comes the sound of the taxi driver behind me. He then comes around me, cutting both me and 3 horses up! These guys are crazy!

We find the skyway again and go on our merry way when I hear a little voice from the back seat “I need a wee wee”. The timing on this couldn’t be better. On one hand I had just spent an hour telling Zack the importance of letting us know when you need to go so we can do something about it, and on the other, I am steaming along a very fast road that I can only describe as spaghetti junction on drugs. If you make a wrong turn here and miss your exit it could take you an additional 30 miles to correct your mistake!

Its dark, I’m going with the fast flow of traffic…. My boy needs to pee…I see a slip road to McDonalds… I see my chance… I take it! The only problem is the slip road went straight past the golden arches of McDonalds and kept on going. We finally got off and pulled into a gas station that had a little shop type thing next to it. Yes, you had guessed it, I had made a wrong turning into the hood.

I suddenly became very aware that I was driving a very new car in a very poor neighborhood. I didn’t know whether to worry about Zack’s wet pants or mine! I asked Sarah and Katie to stay in the car… and keep the doors locked. Zack and I go looking for the toilet… that turns out didn’t exist. Nothing a pee behind the dumpsters didn’t cure.

Needles we were happy to finally get back on the interstate highway back to Indiana. Happy until the fog crept in. Driving 140miles in 10 meter visibility fog is exhausting!

The car goes back tomorrow!

my accent is affecting my noodle

Before I start telling you this, and you don’t know me, My name is Ben German.

So there is this place in the centre of the Indianapolis called noodles and company. They do a menu where there are four price ranges to choose from depending on size. There is Asian, American or Italian to choose from. When you order, you line up, say what you want, pay for it and then say if you want to eat in or take out. Pretty straight for forward right?

I went there with four of my co-workers, Eric, Dan, Anne and Greg. Anne and Eric wanted to eat at the office so the plan was that Dan, Greg and I eat in the restaurant.

Dan orders first, “I’ll eat in” he says to the lady taking the order.

“Here is your number… put this on your table so the server can bring you the order” says the girl at the cash register.

Then it is may turn. I give her my order.

“eat in or take out?” she says

“in please” I say.

“Here is your cup, and what is your name?” she asks

“German” I say.

“John” she says.

“German” I repeat.

“Jim? ” she asks again.

“shewer” (translation: “sure”) I say, throwing in the towel with this line of questioning. I obviously have an accent when I talk and it is lunchtime in a very busy restaurant with an ever increasing line behind me.

I sit back at the table and notice that Dan has a glass drink container rather than the paper take out one I have. A little concerned, I go back to the lady and say. “I’m good to eat in, right?”

“Oh, you want to eat in?.. er OK, I can change your order. It’s Jim right?” she says.

“Er yeah...Jim” I say looking down and kicking my feet.

I then sit down realizing that both Greg and Dan have numbers and I don’t. There server than comes over to drop the food off at our table and says “You changed you order to eat in right?” “Yes” I said with a sigh of relief. “So this is yours then Eric” the server says to me.

“No Eric is stood over there to take, I’m er Jim.”

Even now I don’t know I ate Eric’s food, but I do know that my name is not Jim and I wasn’t going to ask for a beer. If I got asked for ID and I showed then one that said Ben German, it would only make matters worse!

My accent is changing… and I’m starting to correct myself.

So I was on the way home today and a got stopped at one red light after another. With Dan, my co-worker in the car, I raised my voice at the 7th traffic light and found myself saying “come on”, except I pronounced it “Cam ouwn”.

I also noticed that my Ts are turning into Ds. “Shall I spread some peanut budder on it”. My Rs are becoming really pronounced… especially when I say “sure”… I tend now to say “Shwer”. Strange really, I always thought my Rs was nice!

Going around in circles

I went to the drop Sarah off at Castleton Mall to do some shopping and I took the kids swimming. Using the HTC Android phone, I did a search for swimming pool. It found three! The kids were gutted that the places it found were outdoor swimming pools that were covered in snow. I threw in the towel and said, fair enough we will go to the one at the Monon center that is inside. (Generous I know!)

The kids love the Monon swimming pool mainly because of the C current. That is what I am calling it by the way. It looks like the letter C in another letter C. As you go around in circles, the current of the water soon picks up and before you know it you find yourself drifting along. Zack loved it but Katie can only handle it in short bursts before she gets a little freaked out. I usually stick with Katie in the pool if she wonders off as Zack is a stronger swimmer, but from the other side of the pool you just see the top of Zack’s head going around in circles and there is a lifeguard standing right over the C. I once told the kids it was like a big toilet. This is something that I regret as Zack shouted from the other side of the pool “Dad look, I am a poo that has just been flushed”.

“My boy everyone!” – I’m so proud!

Steamy

We were just on our way back from sledging and Sarah said is the engine meant to steam like that? I look down and see that the temperature gauge is pointing at the red.

I quickly pull over to a petrol station that we luckily happen to be next to at the time. I lift the bonnet (hood) of the car and as soon as I manage to prop it up, a couple in a car pull over. A guy “Terrence” opens the passenger side window and asks if I need any help. “erm, yes please” I say knowing that I have only looked at the engine twice before, and one of those was to look at it in an all knowing “stroky beard” type way to show Sarah that the car had an engine when I first bought it. Truthfully I didn’t know where to begin.

Terrence (my guardian angel) got out of the passengers side holding two containers of engine coolant saying “Looks like you need some radiator coolant”.

I couldn’t help but think, how many people travel around with engine coolant containers (yes plural… “Containers”) in the passenger foot well, looking for steaming engines.

“Yep, it looks like the engine has run dry. Pour this in there and a little more in here, until it gets to the max line.”

Glug Glug Glug…

After emptying the two containers he had into the engine he said, “We needs some more, do you know what kind to get?”

“Erm”

“Let me go ahead and show you… This is 50/50 and will freeze in this kind of weather, but this one is a little money but its good for this time of year… Have you got some money? Here let me pay for this…” says Terrence putting his hand in his pocket.

“No Terrence, I will pay for this, you are being generous enough” I say firmly.

“OK, you enter your PIN and I’ll go ahead and put this in the engine.”

Cut to 10 minutes later and I have bought another bottle of coolant (so I have spare) and a bottle of oils that Terrence has checked and suggested I top up. He wouldn’t let me buy him replacements for the ones of his he used.

“OK, I think you are good to go. Drive safe now!” he says with a firm handshake.

“You sir are a gentleman and a saint. Thank you so much” I say in a truly grateful tone.

“Not at all, I’m just glad I could be of help”

And with that, he was gone. It really makes me question the type of person I am and the way I would go about helping someone out. I am sure if someone was in a spot and asked me for help, I would help them, but here it seems people are actively looking for good deeds to do.

As I write this I can’t help but think back to the homeless people under the bridge on the way to work and the men I have seen standing at the traffic light on freeways holding signs saying “I want to get back on my feet, looking for work, any help will be appreciated, god bless”.

I would love to help them and I would certainly pay them for any work they would do for me. The truth is, what work could I give them? I certainly don’t want to be just giving them cash, but this guy has been out here, standing on that spot, holding that sign in -4C for the last 3 hours.

It plays on my conscience.

Snow

It is really snowing. The weather man said there was 6 inches, (his wife said there was just 4). It is really good that the roads were pretty much clear (snow ploughed and gritted) by the time I left for work. They just deal with it here. The snow is very weird though. It is so light and powdery, you can’t make snowman or throw snowballs because it just doesn’t stick together!

VERY Long Day

Quick blog entry… Working hard… Long Hours. Left for work at 8, started work at 9, finished at 8:45 got home at 9:30. Its good work, but when the pressure is on to hit a deadline, it all hands on deck… working all hours.

Tropical Toilet

One difference that I have notice that is a little odd is the way that the heating works here. In the UK we have radiators and fires to warm everything up, whereas here they tend to have what they call “furnaces” and “heating ducts”. When the heating does come on it is more like switching on the car blowers than say the “tap tap tap” of water filled radiator warming up. The most frustrating thing about this is that you will be watching TV and it will kick in. It is so load that you have to turn the volume of the TV up a bit to hear over it. When it switched off the TV is blaring out whatever commercial happens to be on at the time… “HEFTY HEFTY HEFTY” shhhhhhhh be quiet!

I guess the reason why they make them like this is that these double up as air conditioning in the summer. Let’s face it, most of the UK don’t really need this as it never really gets massively hot for long periods of time.

At work there is a similar system, but for whatever reason the heating in the men’s toilets is broken. You can go in there sometimes and it can be like what is termed as a “meat locker” but sometimes it can be like a sauna.

“Are you putting more water on the hot stones?... no, I’m just peeing on the urinal mints.”

Out to the Movies

I have just got back from watching Avatar. My god this is a good film. I hate really long films and my attention span lasts about…. What were we talking about again? This film is 3 hours long but every second of it was good. That’s all I will say about it as I hate over hyped movies. I went with Dan (my work mate) and two of his buddies (Steve and Rob). I offered to drive as he picked up the tickets.

I am not used to Indiana cold. Sure I know that back in the UK it is cold and rainy and miserable weather, well, most of the time. I also know that I love moaning about it. When we came out of the movie theater I have literally never been in that temperature. My car said it was 2 degrees. No biggie right? Don’t forget this is Fahrenheit not Celsius. It work out about -16C. We all ran to the car to get the heaters on full blast (not that it made much difference).

We then went on to an “Irish Pub”. I was the closest thing to being Irish there, but it was a nice atmosphere. Dan referred to as a smokers’ pub. If you like to smoke then this is the place for you.

We sat down at a table and a cute girl came over to me and said, “Can I get you a drink”. Oh Yeah… I’ve still got it! I may be losing my hair but with this smile and these dimples I am truly irresistible. “I’ll have a bottle of Stella, please”

“And you sir” she says talking to Dan.

“I’ll have a Stella too please” says Dan.

“and for you guys…” she says to Steve and Rob.

I’m starting to think she will crack on to anyone… either that or she is serving us drinks. It turns out she was serving us drinks. I have never been to a bar were you have had a server before. A tab wasn’t opened, everyone has ordered… a round hasn’t been bought… It’s all very confusing. What happens if one of the guy’s drinks like a fish and one of the others (me) is a lightweight?

As I sat pondering this, two more of Dan’s friends Leslie and Zack joined us.

I have had one, Dan’s had two, Steve is on water, Rob has had two, Zack’s ordered food, but was that more than… or did I have the… so how many did…

At the beginning I offered to buy a round but now I have no idea of how much I need to pay, but I do know that it is likely to be more than the $30 I have in my pocket.

Crunch time… what’s the damage?

“Here is you bill sir” giving me the bill for just my drink… “and here is yours” giving Dan his. Before I had worked out what was going on, Dan had already paid his. Technically I got out of buying a round, but I think Dan could see I was kind of flustered with the whole experience. I will buy you a pint next time we are out Dan… promise!

After paying up, it was time for a run back to the car… My god its cold!

More like a home by the week!

We finally got a TV cabinet. No big deal right, but hey an few months ago there was NOTHING in the front room (that includes wife and kids)