Saturday, March 12, 2011

Time to Compare Notes

Can it really be 17 months since leaving Blighty? A lot can happen in 17 months.
For the first time in ages I looked back at some of my blog entries and reminisced about what was going through my mind at the time. We soon will be taking a trip back to England & Scotland, and I have promised myself I will be doing a blog entry every day.

When I first got here I was like a child, fascinated about the big cars, the gaps between the toilet doors and the automatic hand towel dispenser in the rest room. I wonder how I will perceive the UK now that I have got used to the American way of life!

• Will everything seem smaller there?
• Will I refer to the toilet as the rest room as I did just a second ago?
• Will I have a mid-Atlantic accent?

The words I use
I don’t think I have picked up much of an accent, (although I did catch self saying “mo-bul” instead of “mo-byle” when talking about a phone the other day). I think the biggest change is the way I say something, but not the accent or the words I use. The best way I know how to describe what I mean is by way of an example:

When asked “Where did you park?”
• UK: I parked on Fir Tree Road, just round the corner from Cherry Street.
• USA: I’m parked over on Fir Tree and Cherry? – (note: this has a question mark because the rising inclination encouraging the person asking the question to nod or say “oh, I know where mean”)

The names I call people
When I talk to my peers, I don’t always use their name. This never used to bother me but when people (in the UK) who you don’t know call you “mate” it really pisses me off (especially if they are clearly younger than you). You’re not my mate, you are a guy selling me some crap I don’t want down the phone… get stuffed! However, if you know the person well then using “mate” is fine. I have found people from the US don’t use “mate” (unless they are doing an impression of an Australian).
The interesting thing for me is that the “mate” equivalent in the US is “Sir”. I get off the bus and say to the driver: “Thank you Sir”. I’m at the bar and ask my friend “does that beer taste good”… “Yes Sir” comes the response. The way I think of it is:
• UK = Cheers Mate
• US = Thank You Sir – (Even though “Sir” seems a little formal, I always take it to be a little tongue-in-cheek).

All said and done, if you did get a call trying to sell you something and they were calling you “Sir” instead of “Mate” I think I’d stay on the phone slightly longer.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

The Early Bus

If I do say so myself, I'm getting a lot better, quite quickly on my rollerblades. I haven’t mastered the crossover turn yet, but I'm sure I'll get there eventually.

I quickly I got to the bus stop this morning. I got there and there was two buses waiting. The 7:45 bus hadn't left yet so I thought I would hop on that one.

I don't know if it was to the pollution warning on the TV last night, asking people to car pool/take the bus or if it was just the earlier bus, but this bus is packed. As I write this I count 34 people... Well dressed business people... Well dressed business people that are looking at me... this sweaty, out of breath, Brit, wearing a helmet and Pads on my elbows and knees. I roll down the aisle saying "morning", but all I see is people looking up from their laptops and iPads in disgust.

I just went to the back of the bus where kitchen area was and got changed into my flip flops, ready for the business day.

What? You mean you don't wear flip flops to work?

Now I have got changed I have sat next to a woman who, let's say, had a bit of trouble moving her bag off the seat where I wanted to sit. I can't imagine why she would have a problem sitting next to the sweaty mess that is me. I think someone needs a hug :0)

I think she just read that. Oops!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Ooh it hurts… right down there and around there.

This morning I jumped out of bed ready to tackle the day head on. I did jump… but I landed on my face. This is something that is becoming a bit common at the moment. My legs are as stiff as boards. My shoulders hurt and I have blisters on my shins (something that I have never experienced before).

I decided to walk to the bus stop on the way to work with the boots tied to my bag.

Last night I couldn’t help but watch some clips on YouTube of people weaving in and out of cones as if they were dancing. It is truly amazing and something to aspire to.

I decided that I will stick to it, so after the bus had driven off from the ride back home after work, I found myself left at the kerb tightening my laces and reminding myself of the things I have seen on YouTube and the things people have said. Bend your knees, balance, turn with your shoulder, don’t talk with your mouth full, push off with your heals, focus on the horizon … and off I went.

I’m up… I’m moving… I’m down… I’m sliding. Well that didn’t quite go like the YouTube videos I had seen!

One thing I have learned is how to stand up on roller blades. I know it seems like a trivial thing, but when you have spent as much time landing on your arse as me, this sort of thing helps.

Off I go again… “Focus on the horizon, don’t look at your feet…. Left… right…”

I’m actually doing it. Before I know it I am making strides, literally strides and making good progress, cruising past yesterday’s accident spots. “In your face accident black spot”

There was a guy in front of me who was walking at a good pace, and I thought as long as I can keep up with him or even better get past him, I am winning. He would be like my pace car.

I shoot past him as he shouts “evening, sure is a nice day for it”

“I’m not doing too bad it is my second day of tried this… I can’t stop to chat… no, literally I can’t stop” I say as I zoom past down the hill.

The main problem with going downhill you indubitably either end up going into another hill, or a stream of some sort. I got the hill. I pushed and pushed as hard I could until I got to the top where the man I just zoomed past had caught up and started walking next to me.

“So where in England are you from?” he said as I was back to doing baby steps.

“Northampton” I say.

“Oh right. I lived Oxford for a few years… You’ll soon master the skates; you just have to stick with it.”

Before I knew it, I was at the bottom of my street, on the home stretch. Three falls (compared to yesterday) and 10 minutes knocked off yesterday’s time. I just have to knock another 15 off and then I break even in terms of the time it takes to get to the bus stop.

I’m going to stick with it, even though the blister has now popped on my shin… ew nice!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

eurgh, what was I thinking!!

So yesterday I had this great vision of a young muscular, erm how should I put this.. I’ll go with, a “bronzed god” streaming past unsuspecting members of the public as they look on with an expression of ore on their faces. “Is he floating on a cloud” they would ask as angels sing in the background.

And that’s exactly what happened… well not quite.

I work up this morning and the ground was wet so I thought I would walk. That turned out to be the best decision I made all day.

After showing off my backpack and skates to my co-workers, I finally had to grin and bear it. I was going have to skate home from the bus stop. I’m getting to know the bus driver quite well now and we quite often have a little chat before we go our separate ways in the evenings.

As I sat on the bottom step of the bus, he congratulated me on going for it and saying “remember, take it slow”…and off I went.

There is a smooth bit of road behind the Meijer store where I get the bus… gently, gently all going good. I didn’t take into account the fact that the weight of my backpack my just have caused me to be a little off balance (excuse #1).

Man, my ankles hurt… keep going, just keep going, bend your legs… keep going straight… MIND THE…. Too late. I was on my bum.

If you fall off a horse you get back on… keep going, swing your arms… God its hot… don’t look at your feet, D’oh! On my arse again. I finally got to the Monon train which is like the home stretch. After three falls I got to a fence where a girl was listening to her iPod, stretching her legs from running.

“I should of got a bike” I say to her.

“You’ll get better with practice. You just need to use your ankles more. It’s difficult to explain but you push off with your heals then steer with the front of your feet.” With this in mind off I go again. And it worked!........ for about 30 seconds.

A quarter of a mile from home, and I am spent! I literally have bruises on my arms and legs and no energy left at all. I gradually went up the hill that just yesterday I was zooming up. I made it to the door and collapsed in a heap as the kids were eating their dinner.

Two bottles of water and a shower later I have just about got my breath back.

I think looking back at it in hindsight, it was a bit ambitions on the first attempt. Like my great father once said to me: “If at first you don’t succeed, give up and do something else”. I will try again though, but maybe I’ll walk a bit too.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

I have new wheels

  • Good - I have to leave work on time, so I get to see more of my family
  • Bad - I need to catch the bus
  • Good - I can chill out, get online or work on the commute
  • Bad - it takes another 45mins to walk from the bus stop and home twice a day.
  • Good - I'm walking 5 miles a day, and getting much needed exercise.
I need a way to reduce the walking time between home and bus stop.

I'm not exactly sure whether it is the smooth paths, the people skating on the Monon trail or the fact that I have been working on maltoskatesallday.com, but I have a desire to skate or should I say rollerblade. In my minds eye, I would like people to look and say, whow look at that guy go. I know deep down they will probably say, "whow that aging bald guy managed to stay up for 10 seconds that time. When I hit 30 and day I want to skate, slap me because that guy looks a mess".

The truth is, right now I don't care. I get the bus fairly early, so hopefully there won't be too many people watching (just enough to pull me out of the hedge), plus the kids are at an excepting age where they don't use the phrase "I wouldn't be seen dead with him".

Today I said bollocks to it and bought the skates, knee pads and a back pack for my laptop. I had a test run today and I made it to the end of the street without falling over. How hard can it be? One thing that did surprise me is the amount of sweat that pours off me. It is 35oC after all.

Tomorrow is the day of reckoning. Bus stop here we come!

Note to self: look up methods of stopping before getting on rollerblades.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Not quite getting it

So I have been riding the muggle wagon to and from work and am actually starting to enjoy the benefits. Not paying for gas, I mean petrol, and to fork out for a parking permit is great. The real benefit is getting exercise in the morning as it is a 45 minute walk to the bus stop. It's not all fun and games as there are some bits that don't have paths, but I figure walking 5 miles a day has to be good for me... I have even lost weight! Well, just a little.

There is a down side to taking the bus. Two words... “Exact change”.
Since now I have been good at looking out for the $1 bills.

I gently strolled over to the stop after work, opened my wallet… and hey presto… empty. Knowing this was the last bus of the day I soon had the feeling of panic rush over me.

I knew that the bus does a loop around ten blocks so I ran past the bus stop in the 29oC heat, lugging my massive laptop bag and a plastic bag with an empty lunch box flapping around, banging on my knee on every alternate step.

I made it to the ATM (cash point). The card readers are slightly different here. You kind of pull the card in then out really quick. I slid my card in and out waited... Nothing.... I try it again and I get "transaction canceled".

Come on, come on. I try again and again. It gave me the "fast cash" option… ironically on the 4th attempt.

I then run 2 blocks in a different direction to get a bag of crisps to break the $20. At this point I have a big beetroot face.

I then run 4 blocks north to get to the next bus stop on the loop.

Made it... Phew! I can even see my bus as a dot on the horizon.

"HEY BUDDY!" - this tattooed guy with two missing front teeth and a scrawny looking stubble, shouts running at me with a "I'm gonna hunt you down" type look.

"er yes" I say in a 'happy to help, please don't kill me' type way.

"I must have been chasing you for 3 blocks. Man you run fast. Didn't you hear me shout? You dropped you wallet!"

"oh thank you" I say, knowing what a pain in the arse it would have been if I did lose it.

"no problem"

"can I have it?" said holding out my hand.

"oh I don't have it - a lady saw you drop it, 2 blocks that way."

"well I was running for that bus, can you run fast to show me this lady? Sorry to do this to you but that is the last bus of the day, so we need to run." - it really didn't matter how positive I wanted to sound to get this guy moving, it is really difficult to motive a toothless guy that looks like he is about to spit blood.

We finally found the lady holding my wallet. She looked like hyacinth bucket (bouquet) from keeping you appearances. I didn't have time to explain, so I took a quick glance in the wallet to check for my cards and then gave her a peck in the cheek to say thanks. It was a split second thing where I thought "Well I am European. "

I ran back to the bus stop. At this point I became aware of a little crowd commentating from the second level of a multistory car park, who had witnessed the whole thing. When the doors of the bus opened a cheer came from above.

I got on the bus and nearly passed out from the running. I told the bus driver I nearly didn't make it.

I found out from my previous journeys that the bus driver is a Brit who lived in Aylesbury called Mick. He married an American and has lived here since 1985. He used to be the sound engineer for Kim Wilde when she was touring. He looks a lot like Bill Nighy but swept back grey hair.

When I told him what I had been through he said, "If you are a regular, I could do you an IOU." I said I would hold him to it.

… the moral of the story is get change!

Friday, May 28, 2010

Our Big St Louis Adventure.

Time for a break me thinks. In the USA you get Holiday time and vacation time. Holidays are what I would have called Bank holidays and Vacation is what I what call Holiday, just so you know the difference. Compared to 22 days vacation I used to get in the UK, I now get just 10. I have started to notice more now than ever how people plan their time so that Holidays are taken side-by-side with vacation so that time off lasts longer. Hopping on the band wagon I booked time off work to spend a long weekend with my family.

I want to see as much of the USA as possible. I’m getting to the stage now where I have seen quite a bit of Indiana, and know my way around Indianapolis without a GPS Sat Nav. Sarah and I looked at a map to find out what was fairly close (within 6 hrs drive) we could take a look at. We finally settled on St Louis, Missouri.

Before we go to St Louis


On our way to St Louis (Sarah driving)


When we finally got to the hotel I was greeted by a warm glowing face saying how can I help you sir….NOT! As I got to the desk I was faced with a girl covered in (what looked like gang) tattoos, chew gum looking at me as if she had no face muscles.

“I have a reservation… here are the details” I say as I hand here a print out

“It not ready until 3pm” as she flicks the paper back to me.

What I didn’t realize is that we crossed a time zone, so everything is off by an hour. We decided to take a drive to the museum to kill some time before our room was ready.

before going to the museum


just visited the museum #1


just visited the museum #2


Our accommodation was bed and breakfast only so we decided to have dinner at the olive garden. I have never been there and the last time Sarah had been, was around 15 years ago.

arrived at the olive garden


After olive garden


Day 2 just getting up before breakfast


Playing with the bug screen after breakfast before the zoo


In the water falls at the zoo


At the zoo - Zack Telling us we have just seen animals and insects

At the zoo - looking at the bear


At the zoo - after the gift shop