credit where credit is due

Robbing B**tards! Right, got that off my chest.

So we have decided to go with the AT&T plan, with all the “free” equipment and “free installation” etc. I rang the guy and said, “Although I have only been here for 4 weeks, we want to go with your plan”. “Certainly Mr German, let me just get you set up here… can I take you address.. blah, blah, blah and your social security number (SSN)”. Sure why not, I now after all have a nice shiny new card (OK it is a crap looking bit of paper, but go with me on this). “OK, I will just run this through and thank you for choosing AT&T”. Excellent! I thought, we will soon be in the land of the living again!

Ten minutes later I get a call back.

“I’m really sorry to tell you that you have no US credit history with your social security” says AT&T man.

“Of course I haven’t, like I said I have only been here 4 weeks and only had a SSN for 1 of those” I say.

“This isn’t a show stopper as we can still go ahead with the install. We just need to take a non-refundable deposit of $450 to cover the cost of the equipment to get you started”

“$450! – Bloody hell! When the I get the deposit back then, or does that come out of my monthly billing?”

“No sir, it is a one off non-refundable deposit”

“How is it a deposit if I don’t get it back… that’s not a deposit that’s me just giving you cash! So do I get to keep the equipment?”

“No sir that is the property of AT&T and will need to be returned if and when you cancel the contract.”

It turns out the only way to avoid this is if it was taken out in someone else’s name and the bill comes to me. For the record I was very polite and thanked him for his time. I the back of my mind I thought rearrange these words to make a sentence relevant to this situation “your up stick your cable ar$e contract”

Breathe!

So... I get in touch with the next best cable company (Comcast) and tell them not to bother doing a credit check as it will comeback with low score or no score. He said in the worst case scenario it would be $150 upfront. I give my details and wait for confirmation. He rang back saying we are all good to go! No upfront fee… nothing. What a lovely chap!

While I am on a roll I decide to give Dave the car guy a ring and say I would take the Kia. When I rang him it was bit of a bad line. “I what to do a deal on the Kia, but you need to ring Tim and let me what the Krack is… huh?.. The Kia deal? Whats the krack?” I then lost the line. I suddenly became aware that lots of mere cat-like heads where popping over the cubicles in the office. “What?” Dan was laughing at me saying that he and I’m sure the others thought I wanted to deal crack cocaine to a girl called kia. Oh great! Yet another British saying that had landed in me in the crap! Don’t worry once I explained what it meant they all found very funny. I’m just dreading the next time I speak to Dave the car guy… unless, of course, he brings his bitches with him :0)